Petition for Pro-life

Student: Bethany Brauer

Professor: Meagan Akins

Sandbox, COM 105 122

04/22/2015

Persuasive Speech

Specific Purpose: To persuade my audience to petition for pro-life.

Central Idea: By petitioning for pro-life, we as the youth can help save humans from being killed and stand for morality.

Introduction

               I.              [attention] Procon.org states, “From Roe v. Wade in 1973 through 2011, nearly 53 million legal abortions were performed in the United Stats – an average of about 1.4 million abortions per year.” 1.4 million babies are killed yearly.

            II.              The debate over whether or not abortion should be a legal choice continues to divide Americans long after the US Supreme Court’s decision on Roe V. Wade.

         III.              I know many people look at pro-life and see freedom taken away from a woman. But when I analyze abortion I see the rights taken away from the baby as well rights taken away from the father. With the issue of abortion, the fight for freedom represses others. I am here today, to be the voice for the unspeakable.

         IV.              I am not asking y’all to go out and grab your picket signs and protest abortion clinics and stand on streets yelling for pro-life. I am simply asking y’all to take action and help create change by signing a petition for Pro-life.

Body

               I.              [NEED]

A.         I know many people look at pro-life and see freedom taken away from the mother. In Society, we believe that a woman has the right to do whatever she wants with her body which is true but when the moment the sperm and egg unite it is no longer only the woman's body. The baby has it's own rights as well. With pregnancy it is no longer just the mother who is affected but also another human, the fetus.

1.           National Geographic Channel aired a segment called “In the Womb” displaying what is going on as the fetus grows. The episode states, "The two cells gradually and gracefully become one. This is the moment of conception, when an individual's unique set of DNA is created, a human signature that never existed before and will never be repeated."

a.           No matter what a human is a human. Once the sperm and ovum unite together the fertilization of the ovum occurs and a new human life begins. Humans can only create another human.

B.         A New York Times article, “Abortion restrictions in the States” gives information on the amount of weeks it is legal to perform an abortion. The number of weeks ranges from 6 weeks and under to no restrictions at all. 1 state has a restriction of 6 weeks, 1 state has the restriction of 12 weeks, 2 states has the restriction of 20 weeks, 8 states has the restriction of 22 weeks, 26 states has the restriction of 24-26weeks, 3 states has a restriction of 28 weeks, and 9 states has no restrictions.

1.           On March 18^th, a woman was lured into a basement responding to a craigslist offer on baby clothes. As she was in the basement 34 year Dynel Lane stabbed the 7 month nearly 8 month pregnant 26 year old mother removing the fetus. Since Colorado has no restrictions on abortion, this crime cannot be considered a homicide. Fox news reports “Lane is being held on suspicion of attempted first-degree murder, first-degree assault and child abuse knowingly and recklessly resulting in death.” Although Lane has many charged against her, not only the murdered baby but as well as the baby’s mother and family will never be given the deserved justice.

C.         The size of a fetus and the fact that it can’t live outside the mother’s womb does not justify abortion.  

1.           The fact is, we all continue to go until our early twenties. A toddler nor a five year old can be self-sufficient either, but does that justify the murder of a two year old or a five year old? So what is the difference?

D.         On my survey I asked, "In your opinion, what would be a reason(s) an abortion should be performed?" some of y'all answered with "if the baby or mom wouldn't make it, unwanted/unplanned pregnancy, or if the mom can't support the baby financially" but the most common answer was if the women was raped. Adoption is a choice anyone can make. America’s Adoption Agency says “For a woman, unexpectedly learning that she is pregnant can be one of the most stressful times she can ever endure. The pregnancy can halt her education, career and other goals she may have. Furthermore, she may not have the finances of a partner in her life to help raise the child, making her situation more difficult.”

1.           In all of these answers abortion is not the only solution. A pregnancy is not a "either-or fallacy" there is another choice besides abortion, the baby can be given up for adoption.

a.           Rape is a serious thing and it can cause serious psychological problems and can result in pregnancy. Taking a horrible, unfair crime and being given something you didn't ask for may seem scary but committing a tragedy out of a tragedy is not the only answer. Giving a baby up for adoption not only saves a life but it also gives others the chance to have a child.

            II.              [Satisfaction]  As a younger generation, we can stand for individual rights of all ages and of all sizes – we can stand for all humans – the ones that can voice their opinion and the one’s who voice needs to be spoken through others. We can encourage pro-life and stand up for life by petitioning.

         III.              [Visualization] Some of y’all may be wondering does petitioning really work? It is a fair question to ask. www.one.org says politicians care about public opinion and “petitions are often the best indicator politicians will receive of where the public stands on the issue.” By signing a petition, you can save a life. You can save a number of the 1.4 million babies aborted every year. You could be the one signature needed to make a change.

Conclusion

               I.              [ Action] I am urging you to take a stand. Take a stand for the sanctity of life, take a stand for the unborn, take a stand for the ones that need support, and take a stand for the innocent conceived in violence.

            II.              Save a life, petition for pro-life. Thank you.

Live without regret

Bethany Brauer

Professor Anthony

ENG 101-110

20 February 2015

Live without Regret

            It was my first year at a new school, I should have been enjoying basketball season and hanging out with friends like a normal sixteen year old. Instead, I was in the children’s hospital.  I had been anemic and receiving iron infusion but all the doctors I had been to were never able to figure out why I was so anemic. I was experiencing awful pain in my abdomen so I had an ultra sound done, which they then determined that my appendix bursts and I had an awful infection in my intestines. I believe in hope.

            I had around

            Through all the pain, the sleepless nights, and isolation of the hospital walls I remained hopeful. I always had friends and family visit me.

            My body went through so many changes.

            The scar down my stomach reminds me each and every day that through every twist and turn in life I have one thing to hold on to, hope. Hope gives me strength and faith that good things are to come. 

Speech Evaluation-Cuture

Bethany Brauer

COM 105-122

Instructor Akin

18 March 2015

Cultural Speech Assessment

            This cultural speech was definitely a tough one. That was truly embarrassing. I knew the information but it was not the topic for me. I am clearly not a history teacher and wasn’t really sure how to get the information across. My Cultural Speech had many flaws compared to my strengths. I felt as if the speech was very choppy, did not flow well, and I couldn’t hold the audiences attention. On the bright side, I thought I maintained a good voice level throughout the speech.

            One of my major weaknesses was the lack of preparation before my speech. I had every intention of studying and bettering my speech over spring break but that did not happen. The night before speech I only read over my speech once, I didn’t practice aloud I only said it in my head. Before speech class I chose to watch 90210 because I was nervous and I knew it would relax me. Not preparing for my speech led to many mistakes throughout my speech. I didn’t make good eye contact because I had to read off my cards and I had written so much on my cards because I didn’t get to know my speech very well. Next time I will e prepared. I will give myself a time crunch on when everything must be done including my written note cards. This way I will be able to get to know my cards and rewrite my cards to condense the information on each card. Without having to read my cards line by line next time I will hopefully succeed in the way I show my interest for my topic.

I am passionate about Moldova and have a love for the country but I did not portray my passion to the audience. I did not pick a very good topic for myself to deliver. I am not a history teacher nor do I desire to be a history teacher. I should have picked another topic involving Moldova instead of doing the history. The organization was in chronological order but the information I gave may have been confusing for those who didn’t know much about the Russo-Turkish war, Romania, and the Soviet Union. I could tell that on the occasional times I looked up that people were lost and not interested. In my next speech I will strive to make my speech interesting and relevant to all. Instead of the audience listening to a speaker reading off her note cards on some boring, not so well put together speech.

            Another weakness was the use of my slide show. I used pictures that may not have been necessary. Even though I had “turn slide on” and “turn slide off” on my notecard I didn’t pay any attention to it. I would forget and once I turned my slide on, I didn’t present it well at all. It was like an awkward pause and I wasn’t really sure how to explain it. I just assumed people would get what was going on. Next time I will be more studious and practice my visual aids and be able to explain what the visual aid clearly.

            The only positives I could get from my speech was my voice, the fact that I put a blank space between each slide, and my time. I thought that I did an okay job at changing my voice and projecting well throughout my speech. Even though I did not use my slide show well I at least had the blank slides in between. I also did well on the time. I owe that to my experience in Moldova. In my conclusion I put some pictures and talked about the meaning of them. Even though that was rough, it helped me get through the speech in the time limit.

            In conclusion, I have more weaknesses than strengths in public speaking. Although I am a weak speaker I now know that I need to prepare, make more eye contact, reduce what is written on my cards, show passion for the topic, maintain the audiences attention, and pick a topic I will be more interesting while speaking. I chose to procrastinate and it greatly influenced the ay I delivered my speech. Even though I need to improve a lot by the next speech and am embarrassed about this speech I now know not what to do next time.

Court Case

Korematsu v. United States -- 1944

Background:

In the state of war and the ongoing fear of espionage and sabotage, the Commanding General of the Western Defense ordered American citizens of Japanese descent to be removed from West Coast military areas. After May 9, 1942 all Americans of Japanese descent were to be removed from these West Coast military areas. An American citizen remained in his San Leandro, California home despite the Civilian Exclusion Oder No. 34. The petitioner was convicted in federal court and appealed his case. In Nineteen-forty two, the Supreme Court viewed his case.

Majority Opinion:

Mr. Justice Black delivered the opinion of the court. He stated, “It should be noted, to begin with, that all legal restrictions which curtail the civil rights of a single racial group are immediately suspect. That is not to say that all such restrictions are unconstitutional.” The Supreme Court justified the fact that a race was single handedly sought out and punished for the acts of war Japan committed. The removal from designated areas was a precaution to prevent acts of sabotage and espionage. In a sense, the Supreme Court ruled that those who did not comply with the removal were in fact of those who were committing the crimes because they refused to show their loyalty to the United States by readily and willingly able to move to the camps. The question brought to the table was whether or not Congress had too much power and justification to discriminate against a nationality. Mr. Justice Black also stated, “We cannot say that the war-making branches of the Government did not have ground for believing that, in a critical hour, such persons could not readily be isolated and separately dealt with, and constituted a menace to the national defense and safety which demanded that prompt and adequate measures be taken to guard against it.” The ruling of Korematsu v. United States largely took the nations protection in the verdict based upon a number of Japanese Americans’ allegiance to Japan. The case was limited to evacuation of military areas because Korematsu committed that crime. Evacuation was seen as an act of prevention from another attack rather than an act of discrimination. To protect the nation from another act of attack and to prevent harm happening from within the country, the majority ruling was in favor of Congress rather than the petitioners. 

My opinion on how this case decision affects society:

 The United States of America is home to many nationalities but as citizens we stand together as a whole. United States citizens shouldn’t be persecuted because the actions of war their home country committed. I agree, in a vulnerable state of war we need to be aware of acts of espionage and sabotage but the actions need to be justified not based on nationality alone. It is too far fetched to look at a nationality as a whole and label them as a threat to the United States. So, in my opinion, the Supreme Court should not have ruled against the petitioner, Korematsu. Today, even though the United States isn’t officially in war the Supreme Court ruling does not protect immigrants and descendants of Arabs from segregation and removal from their homes. People of Arabic decent are not protected from the eviction from their home and the replaced to camps. It is sad, but the views of people do change in times of war. I know in every case there are traitors, we live in an imperfect world where war and strife will always exist but that does not give others the right to discipline the innocent because of the guilty. It is important to understand that even in times of anger and the overwhelming feeling to correct the wrong of a country by punishing the people of that nationality has no justification. The Supreme Court ruling to me also iterates that all people of the same nationality or ethnicity are the same. It does not destroy stereotypes and discrimination in fact, it justifies them.  

Personal definitions of words in context

The bubbly friend yells “Heyoo hoes” as she walks closer to her friends. Her mood instantly changes to happy. Happiness overwhelms her and her friends as they catch up from a long summer break. They tell each other about their shopping, and another showing off her rad seashell. The group of girls can be characterized as the most indecisive, misfit girls around town. They rarely pick anything to do so they usually just sit around and talk. This much talking leads to gossiping. The girls know who loathes who, each and every strength and weakness of each other, when the others are going through hard time. They talk and laugh look up to the sky as they eat sandwiches. The girls gain their sassiness and become cray cray around each other.  Although they are dainty, they have raw power that they gained through change and the weak times in their lives. They are a stacked clique and alone they do not qualify alone but as a whole each girl brings a beastly aspect to form the group into a perfect circle. The danky friendship is pure fire to each individual.

The Heart and the Fist

What is the purpose(s) of the text and who is the audience?

The purpose of the text is to inspire and give hope to those who are not sure about what to do with their life. Throughout the book you see Greitens chapter by chapter go through the chapters of his life trying to figure out what he wanted to do. He tried a numerous of things, gone to many countries and finally found his calling as a navy seal. I think he is sharing his story to help people understand that when you firast head into the adult world your plans may not be the plans you were meant for. We just need to take a step back and help others to find who we are.

The audience is generated towards younger adults and also vets or people who had gone through what he had

Speech Evaluation

Bethany Brauer

Instructor Akins

COM 105-122

14 April 2015

Informative Speech Self-Assessment

Ironically I chose my topic thinking that I would inform people the dangers and the effects of stress on the body. Instead, I put myself in a never ending hole of stress and I'm honestly surprised I did not go into cardiac arrest while giving my speech. I am ashamed of this about myself but I am the queen of procrastination. I literally waited till the night before the day I gave my speech to not only do the research but also write my outline. Procrastination bit me in the butt because my speech outline wouldn't save properly and I had to end up taking pictures of my outline and printing it off because I didn't have time to redo it for the fourth time. The day of my speech I had every intention to get all dressed and at least look presentable. Well, I woke up late and had to rush to my 8:30 class basically the way I woke up. After my government class I had to run to target to get notecards so I could write my speech on the notecards. As I was driving to speech class i dabbed concealer and put a few strokes of mascara on. So, needless to say I was incredibly stressed and unprepared for my speech. I am not one to make excuses and I completely take full responsibility for the ways things worked out but I can honestly say I am also surprised that it wasn’t terrible.

Let’s start with the negatives. First of all I obviously was not prepared. I had a poorly written speech and did not make time. I added new information into the conclusion (I did it in my cultural speech as well) when I should have made it a main point. I should have included ways to relieve stress in my main points and written a proper conclusion. If I had done so I believe I would have made time. Next time, I WILL finish my outline early and have someone review it or even go to the writing center for help because I have made the error before and it pretty important to have a properly written essay.

Another negative would definitely be my lack of eye contact. At the podium I feel like I made good eye contact but in the video I came to the realization that I barely looked up. This is once again due to the lack of preparation. I just need to KNOW my speech. I need to practice it over and over again instead of literally glancing at it once before I spoke. Next time, I will be prepared (at least I plan on it) I just need to get my act together and become a better more efficient student instead of just “getting by.” I also used my visual aids poorly which also reflects my lack of preparation once again. Preparation is key to success. Since I wasn't prepared I only used one of my visual aids and I basically forgot about my other slides. I just need to stop being an irresponsible student and start preparing and practicing for my speeches.

Now that I have covered my negatives, I would like to pay attention to a certain number of positives I did while presenting my speech. Well actually i can only shine the light on one thing. I had good voice. When I was in High School I was in the FFA and competed on many leadership teams. One was radio team. I know how to present my voice properly and clear and add impact to the message through annunciation and voice changes. Being on radio team, I was always behind a door and never in front of anyone so i got use to reading off of my cards. Although I believe having a good voice is good it doesn't really matter if the presentation has poor eye contact.

I clearly have room for improvement but at least I can't get worse on my remaining speeches, well hopefully. I need to get my life together and become more organized and honestly that will improve my speaking skills because I will be able to complete the assignment properly, have more eye contact, use my visual aids better and impact my audience through my voice and my presentation. I know where I need to improve, I just have to make the effort.

I was honestly not listening to a word she was saying. I was so tired so I was just browsing pinterest instead. I could hear what she was saying but I wasn't listening. I still believe that stress is harmful, the way you look at it doesn't change physically what is doing to you. This can relate to anything medically. If you have strep throat you don't just let it get worse because you have changed your attitude and way of thinking that it is actually good for you. No matter what your immune system suffers. When I stress i start to puke and am nauseous. I like to stress controllably because I think it helps work harder and it gives me a “high”. Everything she said about stress increasing compassion...that is a way to relieve stress. I just did a speech over stress and everything she said terminates all my research. Stress is natural (flight-or-fight) and I think that was the only aspect of stress she was looking at. Flight or fight is good because it prepares your body to either stand and fight or run away from things.

I have a conflict with my future. When people say you go to college to find yourself I believe it is a place to lose yourself. I do not mean this on a morally based or religion based idea that you part from what you have believed in all your life but rather you lose yourself in the fear of what the future holds. I am so confused right now on what I want to do with my life. I left Texas to come to MSU but that didn't work out so i transferred to OTC and it turns out the degree I transferred for is no longer in my interest. I feel like I am just lost. I want to return to MSU for nursing and then head back to become a Nurse Practitioner because I will have more independence and broaden my work experiences. All I can think about is what if it doesnt work out again? instead of thinking, what if this does work out and i absolutely love being a nurse. I feel like I am letting my parents down if I don't decide soon and I dont want to waste their money on pointless classes if I dont want to end up doing it. I just can't decide what to so. I think they should bump the adult age to 21 or higher because when you're 18 you have more things to worry about than the future. When you're eighteen you want to have fun and be carefree but life slaps you in the face and says decide now or you will never accomplish anything. My biggest problem is I just want to run away from my responsibilities and life decisions and board a plane to Greece and just lay out on those beautiful beaches. I guess I just need to look deep inside myself and find out what God really wants for me. With all the worrying I have diluted his plan for me because I begin to make plans of my own. I honestly think I left MSU because my roommate and I did not get along and that really put a dent in my “fun college experience” and that was a wrong reason to leave. So i think I've made my choice, I am going to be a bear.

There is nothing to worry about. Life will work out. You’ll do great things no matter what you decide to do. Just keep your head high and quit putting more pressure on yourself because you have your standards raised to the clouds. You won't be a failure.Choose what you love and what you are particularly good at/called to do. You worry about yourself and the earthly things far too much instead remember to turn your worries and eyes to God and you will find security. Be a bear. Have fun in college and never regret what you chose to do, because those regrets are what hold people back. You will find yourself again.

Don’t worry about the money you make, don't worry about the earthly things just keep your eyes on me and me in your heart. Never forget that you aren't alone. Never forget that I have a plan for you. Renew your mind daily and take yourself out of everything and simply look for what I have to say. Bring glory to me not to yourself. In everything remember that I am God. Don't worship other things that dilute your understanding of the meaning of your life and the meaning of your faith. Simply just go with what you are called to do. You dont need to impress others they are not the final judge;.

Agent Beckette

Bethany Brauer

To an agent everyone or anything is the enemy. Agent Beckette walks very peculialyr in the way down the street and across the sidewalk. Once he reached his classified destination of the street bench he needed to remain calm and unnoticeable but a pigeon would not let him be. This persistent pigeon got the attention of Agent Becekette because it was demanding. Beckette knew this pigeon was an enemy spy because its tactful ways to get the bagel in the air as a distraction so it could get inside the briefcase . Once in the briefcase, Beckette realized he was under attack as the lasers beamed in his direction and chaos erupted all around him. The smell of smoke, the sounds of sirens, crashing, and screaming were in the surround area. He nw he needed to stop the bird. So he used the oldest trick in the book to distract this nuisance, lure him with the mind of his stomach. Beckette thought it would be easy and nothing would go would but he realized the bird was one step ahead of him once again. The bagel precisely landed on the nuclear launch button. The pigeon must be a German spy though Beckette.He had to act quickly and as he acted he decided to follow the rocket and destroy it himself even if it meant he wouldnt live. With no fear just action he readily came up n the rocket until that dumb pigeon struck again. The pigeon was in the way of a clear shot. Beckette a compassionate man, knew this pigeons actions were under the control of someone else. A sweet pigeon could never do this on its own. So Beckette thought quickly, pressed his thumb on the scanner and opened the briefcase letting the bagel go. As he had expected the pigeon took a nose dive following the bagel allowing a perfect shot to prevent Moscow, Russia from becoming rubble. As he let his missle go at the touch of a button a loud boom and dark cloud of smoke filled the Washington D.C. area. As a hero he drifted down to the ground. But when he saw the mess around him he realized he was manipulated and deceived by a pigeon he cover his tear filled eyes with his dark glasses and walked away in shame rather than a hero.

Discription

Bethany Brauer

Her dark skin complexion compliments her natural brown hair. Her brown hair doesn't say much about her, some say she acts like a blonde others make fun of her as if she had red hair. Her complexion seems as if she goes natural without makeup despite the fact that she does wear makeup. Her beauty is gentle on the eyes and her mysterious deep brown eyes compliment her dark skin and dark hair. Her mysterious and somewhat crazy brown eyes hide behind her glasses. Her muscular defined physique hides behind comfy gym clothes. Her confidence radiates throughout the room and walks taller than her actual height. Although her confidence radiates moments of doubt enter her mind causing nervous nail biting. Socially, she shows every emotion on her face as she talks but on a stranger level, she may be considered quiet and anti-social.

The sky is blue. Blue is a chasm we face daily, when the sun goes up in the morning until the sun goes down in the evening. Then we face darkness. The thing about blue s that it always comes back. After the scariest storms, longest winter months, and night it is still blue.

Her skin resembles a leaf in the peak winter and compliments her hair. Her hair is filled with different hues such as the bark on a tree. Despite her actual color of hair, she is characterized as a dummy and teased like a ginger. She adds color and covers imperfections but does not over cover her face. One can easily get lost in her colorless, dark eyes. She hides her eyes behind frames. Her physique is slim yet built and hides behind a t-shirt and gym shorts. Her assurance in herself radiates as she walks through a room. She walks as if her height resembles the length of a giraffe despite her actual height resembles the length of a horse. Although, her self-assurance is great she has moments of doubt and begins to frantically place her fingers in her and gnaw on her nails. On a stranger level, she may seem distance. But when you begin to talk to her its not as if you are talking to a brick wall. She shows her interest and cares about what others say and shows her feelings on her face as she talks.

Smile

i feel- emotional/gut

I think- logic/evidence

I believe-evidence/confidence

I know-evidence

I believe…….

that anyone is capable to accomplish their dreams (reasonable/scientific proven)

that kindness changes a person’s day

a single smile can brighten up at least one person

your attitude affects your performance

that everyone can do better

it is my responsibility to make others feel welcome

that a person is not truly compassionate without humanitarian work

faith alone can save you

Walking up and down the hallways you see two types of people: the one with a glommy look and the other with a smile. When yu passss the person with a frown yu kinda feel down. But whe you pass someone with a smile it encourages you and wants you to smile. Smiles are a good way to make yourself approachable. I believe those eho smile more are the ones who always have a group a people around them or are easier to spark a conversation with. In Community College it is really hard to meet peole becasue you daily have a routine of coming to school and leaving. Instead of investing yourself into those around you in classes and n the hallway. Why do people alwasy have music in? to avoid conversation at least thats why I do it becaseu I am sick and tired of small talk i want soemthing more. A smile tells people you are interseted in them. Even while taliking, you need to show emotion through smiling so the person doesnt feel like they are talking to a brick wall. Yu need to let them know that what they are sayinf is interesting and you want to hear more. I believe this beaeu i have experienced it. Lasts semester i wasted my life as MSU i didnt interact with others. I has to get use to college life away from my family and i ended up isolating myself. The one thing that made me want to reach out to others was when i was greetted with a smile instaead of seeing the top of someones head as they walked passsed. So, i would smile at otehres as i walked to class and it made my day when they would return the smile with a smile and a hello. As i sat doen for calss, i would smile and spark conversations with the students around me. Even though the people i sat with were different from me in tastes of music, movies, and lifestyle we always hasd something to talk about. I am a very awkard person and it gives me pain to sit in awkward silence but i dread being the first to speak up becasue i dont want to make a fool of myself so instead i smile and then compliment someone.

What if..

What if……

I didn’t go to college?

I moved downtown?

moved to a different country?

I moved to the west coast?

i moved to the east coast?

I could change the world

i could run fast

i had motivation to exercise?

I had the motivation to never procrastinate

I am dreading coming to class

I want to skip class

I want to sleep al day long

i had no set backs

i turned my dreams into reality

i flunk speech class

i just dont care about this writig class

everyday was filled with happiness

everyday was like today

everyday consted of sunshine with a light breeze

What if I had no set backs.Setbacks make me depict my liffe for what the basics of it could be. Instead of living to the potential i led set backs hold me down. With the setback of money I would travel the world not caring but in reality i dont to go inot debt before my ninteenth birthday. With the set back of i shouldnt do that becaue its not who i am i would so eh who cares be crazy and energetic and make friends easily. With the set back of not nowing what to say when i meet strangers i would just ramble on and on. With the set back of being quiet and shy i would just supriese people with what i really wantto say. I guess it all come down to the setback of worrying about being judged or making a fool out of myself. Jim Carrey makes a fool out of himsefl and he is hilarious. Adam Sandler makes a fool out of himself in most of his movies and thats why i love t watch every movie he stars in becasue i secreatly wish i had the courage to ast crazy and not care what people think. I really dnt care with my apperacence obviously but i care about how people will treat me if i taked nnsense becasue i can make myself look more presentable but with my peronslity that never changes. Unless i am shot up with caffeine at four n hee morining i am pretty weird. I am also a big nerd but i play dumb in many situtions besauces most he nerds in my life were rude and degrades people and i never wantto do that to someone else so i just play it cool. SPLEEP ALEEP SLEEP. I need sleep. blah blah blah. blah blah blah. Setbacks anchor me to meteorcher levels when i want to truly excel. I dont want to be ole plain jane i want to be standing out and not just a nother face you pass in the hallway. But to become that person i would have to het out of my comfort zone and that terrifies me and is another big set back for me. I am same in m litle shell but in the real world i a m vulnerable and i hate that. I feel as if i will get hir again.

What if i turn my dreams into reality? I woulsnt be sitting in this cloassroom at this moment. I would be traveling instead of writning dumb lists or looping. With my dreams i would be n a healthy realtionship and ready to mov onto a serious committment. I would be taking daring adventures and not caring what would happen. I would be crohns free and living my life to the fullest. I wuldnt care what was to come the next day becauw it would another adventure awaitng  to happen. In reality as of today my biggeaert adventure will probaly be at work. Either i will have an awful child or allsaints for the y primetime afterschool care. Or an accident like yesterday where a girls lip buted apen and might have to have stiches. but al leatst i wasnt on my watch it was on scotts watch. I dream scott and i wouldnt be so awkwars at work just being on our phine due to ony meeting for the firat time three says ago. I dream i could make a difference. In primetime i can make a difference. My dream wulf be to move to a big city and get the tast of what is it like in other parts of the country. i only kno the  country but moving to springfield was a big step, whas next? …………………………………………………………………………………….

dreasm make us who we are. ou can either have a big imagination or a samll imagination on where your life can go. is your going to mean something or ae oou just goignt to live day by dayu? I dont want to live day by day i wantt o live every moment by moment and hold on to the little things that evenually turn int big things. lasfljldjsdkfksjflsjdfljslfjsjlsjflsjfljaljfdlasjfjsjfsjflsjfsjfjfkfjskdfjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjf.

I guess it all comes down to trust. Having trust and hope tha teverything will be okay is one of the hardest things I have been struggling with. I jump to conclusion and just believe the worst whle I am suppose t o be filld wiht joy and hope that the will be done. I Dont understand alot of things that are heppening such as the major I was persuing didnt work out and the major I have recently chosen I am now unsue about. I fear that everything wont work out so  try to take control but thats not working out very well. Everyon e has talents and I thought that the medical field was just for eme but now I just dont now. I am limited on talents but it is just hard for me to chose what i want to do the rest of my life. I really want to work in a city but in the “bad part of town” beause I believe I can make a difference. I have not been putting my trust into making a difference for others instead I want to maeke my life better for me. I have come into a elfish groove and I want to get out of it. I worry about medical things but I have great people around me to suppor me through all of that. I want to be there fot the peope that have nothigng and dont have the support og a family like mine. I just need to trust that everything will work out for th ebetter and that I van influence people in a way that makes them want to rememerb me and know that I will always be there for them. I was worried about a job but I recently judt got hired at the y and work at an elementary school for the gifted children. It i s wonderful anf the kids are so sweet. I see this as a moment to be a mentor and let those childen knoe that I will be there for them whether it be for homewotk, just to talk, or unwind and have fun with games. I didnt have trust in the ability for me to get hired but it worked ut. I dont ahve trust to where I will become the person I want to be nadn choose the professon I will be satisfied with for the rest of my life. I just dont noe.

Fear

Fear is the numbr one setback in the lives of people. We are too scared to take a risk or too scared about what people ma ythink of us. The silly thing is fear is  a state of mind.. I believe fear will control your life if you let it. Dont be afraid to take a risk or dont be afraid to do a spontaneous action you have always dreamed about. Letting fear hold you back will but so much regret into your life. I have a fear of my dreams crsashing and burning in front of me so I dont take action. If i dont take action how will I be able to ever accomplish my dream of traveling? I have been sick with an auto immune disease sand have to be on medicine and I have had surgery. The doctor told me I will probabbly have to have another surgery in my lifetime. I have let this disease set me back for two years. I have always wante to take a year of of college and travel but now I am sitting in the computer lab working away on my assigned work. I have let my dreams just rot. I have become my biggest fear. I am burning my dreams before tey evven take off. It is a ridiculous thing to be set back. I know I will have to take my medicine through infusion every eight weeks. But what am I foing with my life between those eight week periods? Nothing. I am very greatful for the ability to come to college but I want experience in the real world and I want to know how other people live. I have a heart to help others in need and I have always wanted to wither teach, practice medicine, or maintain an orphange in another country. I am in the United States but I dont see the problems around. I can go to poverty parts of the country and still make a difference like I would in other parts of the worls. I know I can travel short term but I am alsways in fear I will have a flare in different parts of the worls. I guess it all comes down to trust.

The Power of a Small Gesture

I believe in chasing your dreams. Regret should not replace your dreams. As I have watched my life go by day after day, I am disjointed. I am young and able to fulfill my dreams but fear, doubt, and other factors hold me back. I have waited for an opportunity to come my way so I would know that my dreams are meant to be. But as I have waited and waited nothing has taken its toll. It is my responsibility to take action instead of waiting for life to happen. Regret often leads to struggles as you get older, I for one don't want to feel sorry for myself nor do I want to blame others for my dreams crumbling in front of my face.

Learning to take help

I use to be a very independent person and believed that I didn't need to rely on anyone but myself. Well, my independence crumbled down the day I was admitted into the hospital and learned that I needed a serious surgery. I have always been able to take pain well and I hated letting people see the weakness inside of me. So I became very angry that I was going through this at the age of sixteen when I should of been out with friends and playing basketball. Lying in the hospital bed I tried my best to mask my pain and simply had a smile on my face even though on the inside I was screaming. Approximately two months later I had my surgery and when I woke up in the recovery room I began to cry and could not control my feelings because this was the worst pain and experience I had been in. As the weeks progressed I was able to sit up with help and walk with help. I have never been welcoming to help because I thought I could do everything on my own. My Junior year of high school was a dark year for me. I honestly look back on it now and realize that I couldn't have made it through the year without the help of my family and friends. I think showing weakness isn't such a bad thing after all. When you are weak that means there is alwasy room for improvement. Little did I know that the weakness of my body helped the weaknesses I struggled with of felling vulnerable.

My Grandpa (free write-excuse the grammar and misspelling)

My Grandpa was probably the funniest yet scariest persn I have ever met. He would always crack jokes and play timeless pranks but as he grew older and sicker the medicine effected his moods. He will always be the jokster to me but the part of him being a grumpy old man was also a big part in his life. He passed away when I was forteen to lung and throa tcancer. he wsa sick for so long bt he handled hwith jokes and joy. He never once seemed sorrowful infront og us grandkids. That to me is the bravest thing a person to do, get through the pain to stop the worrying of his children and grandchildren. I wish my life was centered around him more because if I knew i would lode him before I got my iscese and high school graduation I would have made a point in my life to mkae sure he was a part of the small things in my life. Looki g back now I can remmeber a ffew small things he let me do. He saw me drive for the first time as he was in the passenger seat when I was seven down old country roads and he saw me change over ht e years fom a small child to a high schooler. I was only in high school for exactly one week when I was taken out of cheer practice early and taken to my friends house after we found out about hi passing. It was so hard because he swas the olny person I knew so weell to die in my family. My Grandad died when I was four s o I dont even remmeber what was going on. I miss him everyday especially on holidays becasue he alqays made a point o make them special in his own way with his loving caring heart. He dressed up as Santa on Chistmas day and gave us presents. After his passing we didnt have hristmas the same way anymore. But since my sister has two kids my dad and mom decided to take on the tradition and legecy my grandpa ledt behind to mkke my nephews Christmas’ just as my grandpa made it special to us.

He was sick for so long but he handled it with jokes and joy.Cancer destroyed my Grandpa physically but mentaaly he never once showed weakness in front of me. I would here a few groans from the pain but he never said he was hurting becasue he knew he needed to stay strong for not only me but for the rest of my family. My Nana also sufered from cancer but she had surgery and is now cancer free. So, through the pain my grandpa went through he saw my nan suffering. He was the rock to our family. He kept everyone in line an d kept us all togeher as one big happy family. I could not imagine my grandpa having to have a harder task in life than being the strongest person while he was physically the weakest person out of out faily. Even though he is gone now, I can reminesc and justremember hat all good things come to an end but its how you go out in the end that matters. He ws a great influence in my life in our faith and values. I always new I could go to him for wisdom. I just wish he was here with me now hat i am older and actually need the wisdom he had. I know onot to taek a single breath or a single person for granted becsue eventualy we will lose them. I have hope in when I will see my Grandpa again. Honestly, thats the only thing I can hold onto is the hope of the second coming and the ho faith that I will be reunited with lost loved ones and friends. Impacting someones life is possibly the easiest ting you can do but its what you do with it that changes the person. You can influence them poorl or influence them greatly. Its your choice. Im glad and very thankful my grandpa chose joy over sorrow becasue it would have been so hard for us to see sorowful in his waiting for death. It would have bee n depressing for everyone in my family. But thats bnot who my randpa was. He was the greatest man and I can only hope for a husdand who will be s good as him.